Another morning slept away and now Coran was fretting over her. She had to explain that she was just catching up on missed sleep before he’d leave her be. She didn’t want to get into this with him. It was possible he knew some ways to burn off excess quintessence from his years of serving her father, but she was rather afraid that his mind would go straight to the, well, obvious answer. And then he’d be truly insufferable: “we have to find you a proper partner” and he’d probably organize some sort of pageant to determine which of the paladins – the readiest source of partners to hand – would be most suitable, and… ugh.
	No, it was better this stay a secret and she only tap into Coran’s seemingly bottomless knowledge of trivia as a last resort. Besides, things were better with her and Shiro now. He wasn’t avoiding looking at her as he had been the quintant before, anyway. If anything, he seemed to be avoiding looking at Keith; she caught the Red Paladin studying Shiro curiously. 
	The energy was kept in check a bit longer now, but still it began to rise. She resolved to try to push through; it was improving steadily, after all, and maybe she could sleep without recourse to… Shiro’s assistance.
	It was nice to have an excuse though.
	She created more busy work for herself through the day cycle hours – including a re-read of the source texts to try to ferret out another solution – bid everyone good night at a reasonable time and went to bed. She stayed up playing with the mice for a little bit and then settled in to try to sleep.
	It took her several vargas before she gave up. She wasn’t quite as restless as she had been before all of this, but she still wasn’t having much luck sleeping. She pulled her robe on and padded down the Castle hallways towards the kitchen. Honestly, as much as I slept today, it’s hardly any surprise I’m having trouble sleeping tonight! Even without the excess energy, it’d be understandable. And that would be her excuse if anyone caught her out of bed.
	She blinked and stopped dead in the doorway when she realized the kitchen was occupied. Realizing who it was only helped a little bit. Well, at least my excuse isn’t needed. “Shiro, I’m surprised you’re still up this late.”
	He looked up and smiled thinly at her. “Princess. I could say the same about you, but… maybe I shouldn’t be surprised?” He was leaning against the wall, wearing the loose-fitting black pajamas the Castle’s manufactor had created for him. He had his hand – his real one – wrapped around a mug.
	She shrugged and headed over to get herself a mug of milk. “It’s getting better every quintant – thanks to you – but between that and sleeping so many vargas, sleep at a proper time is apparently out of the question. If some warm farre milk and a bit of light reading don’t help me sleep, then I suppose I’ll have to get through tomorrow without it.”
	He frowned. “Allura…”
	“Yes, yes, I need to rest. I swear, you’re nearly as bad as Coran.” She redirected the spotlight. “And what’s your excuse for being up then?”
	It was his turn to shrug. “Some nights I just… don’t sleep well.”
	She blinked. “This is an ongoing problem?”
	“It’s nothing you can do anything about,” he pre-empted her.
	“You don’t know that.”
	“I do know that. It’s not like… There’s nothing you can do.”
	“I can listen, if you need to talk?” she offered. She made herself resume getting out the milk and heating it. “The universe needs you well-rested, too.”
	His smile was still thin. “I appreciate that, but I… can’t.”
	“Can’t or won’t? It’s okay if you don’t want to, but we are supposed to be honest with each other, yes?”
	He started to protest. “I didn’t mean…”
	“You still said it. And you were right to say so. So, we should be honest. I’m not going to make you talk about something that makes you uncomfortable, but at least tell me that that’s what’s going on.”
	He sighed and didn’t answer. She didn’t press him, just resumed heating up her milk. When it was ready and she was holding the delightfully warm mug in both hands, he finally spoke.
	“It’s a little bit of both. There are things I don’t want to talk about, and there’s still a lot that I just can’t talk about because I can’t even remember it.” He was staring down into his mug. “I know that it’s a result of either physical or mental trauma. I know it’s not… it’s not anyone’s fault that I can’t remember. But I also know that I hate feeling like part of my past is locked away from me, and on nights like tonight, I only get scraps of memories, not enough to piece together but just enough to torment me.”
	He finally looked up to her. “These are the nights when I really worry about who and what I am anymore.”
	She remembered his declaration on the bridge last night, that he was a weapon. That being with her had made him feel human again, briefly. She set her mug down and walked over to him. “You’re Shiro, the Black Paladin of Voltron,” she told him. “You’re a brave man, a good man, a man who’s willing to sacrifice so much to help as many people as possible. I thrust upon you an impossible destiny, and you have risen to every challenge and then some.” She laid her hand over his heart. “You’re a leader, Shiro, but not a tyrant. A fighter, not a weapon. You give the universe hope.” She smiled at him.
	He smiled back, and it was closer to the genuine smile she’d caught glimmers of before. “Thank you. I’m not sure if I believe you, but it’s nice to hear anyway.”
	“Well, it’s how I see you anyway. How I’ve seen you for a long time.” She realized she still had her hand on his chest and she pulled it away hastily before he thought she was trying to… start something. She cleared her throat and returned to her milk. She took a long pull from her mug and closed her eyes as she sighed happily.
	“Good?” he asked.
	She nodded and opened her eyes. He was still smiling. “Well,” she searched for something to say so she wouldn’t just stand there and smile at him smiling, “surely some of your dreams are good?”
	His cheeks flared, an interesting contrast to the scar across his nose, and he cleared his throat. “Some of them.” He raised his mug to sip at whatever it was he was drinking.
	“Can I hear about those?” She wanted to prompt him to recall happier things, in the hope that would settle him somewhat. She sipped more of her warm milk.
	“Um.” He shifted his weight and wasn’t looking at her again. His blush was deepening. 
	She stifled a chuckle. “Oh, honestly, you have to have dreams besides those kind.”
	That got him to look at her again, eyes wide. “I do! Really, I do, but it’s kind of hard to remember them at the moment.”
	She grinned. “Well, I won’t mind if you want to tell me about those.” When his eyebrows rose at her, she shrugged. “Honesty, remember? Besides, after the last couple of nights, I doubt you’re really going to shock me much.”
	He cleared his throat and sipped at his drink again. “I don’t think I can do that. I mean, say those things out loud. They’re… they’re fantasies, they’re not meant to be real.”
	Her brow furrowed. “Is that what you truly believe?”
	“There’s no way any of that is going to happen. I don’t even really want most of it to happen. It’s just… it’s not even…”
	She set her mug down. “I thought I was your fantasy, Shiro?”
	He looked wary. “You are, in the broad sense, but…”
	“Am I not real?” She stepped closer to him. 
	“Well, yes, but we’re talking about two different…”
	She smirked up at him. “If one fantasy can come true, who says the others can’t?”
	He arched a single eyebrow. “If you want help sleeping, just say so.”
	“I want to help you to sleep, too. But I can’t make you tell me…”
	“Thank god,” he breathed.
	“…so how about if I guess?”
	“WHAT?!”
	Her smirk widened into a grin. “If I guess right though, you have to say so. Honesty, remember?”
	“Um…” He licked his lips. “I really ought to say no to this.”
	She shrugged. “You can if you want, but I don’t see why you think you ‘ought to’ say no.”
	Shiro opened his mouth, then closed it again and shook his head. “I guess there’s not really a reason?”
	“So, can I?”
	“Go ahead.” He set his own mug aside.
	She beamed. “Stand still.” 
	“What?” 
	But she was already moving. She grabbed a couple of folded dishtowels and dropped them on the floor in front of Shiro. He looked at them and then back up at her.
	“Oh, yes, you’ve got it. I have secretly longed for gorgeous women to throw linens at my feet.”
	She snickered and stepped forward – though not on the pile of dishtowels – and pressed herself against him. That dropped all the levity from his face instantly. His eyes searched hers and then widened as she began to slide down his body. “I… thought you were going to guess?”
	“I am. I never said I was going to use words.”
	He swallowed hard. “Allura, this isn’t…”
	“Not one of your fantasies?” she asked from where she was now kneeling on the dishtowel cushion she’d provided for herself. She had her hands on his thighs as she looked up at him.
	“I, uh… didn’t say that.” His face was getting redder.
	She smiled innocently. “You don’t want me to?”
	“I definitely didn’t say that,” he told her, the rise and fall of his chest already quickening. “But it’s not…”
	“Not what?” she asked sweetly as she began tugging down the waistband of his pajama pants.
	“It’s not right,” he replied immediately. “For you to… like this?” He shook his head. “No. No, Allura, I can’t let you do this.”
	She paused and stood again. “What if I told you I want to?”
	He blinked at her. “You’re joking.”
	She looked him straight in the eyes and ignored the blush coming to her cheeks. “I’m not. I can’t help but be curious about…” She deliberately trailed off.
	He took the bait, of course. “…about?”
	She hoped the pause she needed to get the words out wasn’t too obvious. “About what you’d taste like. How you’d react to being pleasured that way. And, in any case, I think it’d help you.”
	“Help me?!” He sounded a bit incredulous.
	“I’ll explain – with words – but I do want to understand your objection first.”
	“It’s just that, like this, kneeling on the floor, it’s… You deserve better than that.”
	“I don’t find it degrading,” she told him. “I want to do this. Are you okay with it?” And then, as she remembered what had started this, “And is it a fantasy of yours?”
	He hadn’t stopped blushing, and now it only got worse. “I-if you want to, I… I’m okay with it. And,” he looked away from her, “it is a fantasy of mine, I’m sorry.”
	“Don’t be sorry and don’t be ashamed.” She dropped back to her knees. “And I’m going to explain why you shouldn’t be upset about this, and why I think it’ll help you.” She reached up to start (finally!) sliding his pants down. 
	“I’m all ears.”
	“Well, not all,” she purred as she freed his cock. 
	“Explanation, please.”
	“It’s a power fantasy.” She took gentle hold of his growing erection with both hands and smiled up at him. “I’m a princess – the last princess of my people – and I am choosing to lower myself before you to please you. 
	“You are feeling particularly powerless right now,” she pointed out as she began stroking him. “But you are worried about power through violence. This is not that. You have not conquered me. You are not subjugating me.” She gave the head a quick lick and he trembled. “I am choosing this. I want to feel you in my mouth, to taste you in my throat…”
	“Allura!” His surprise came out a bit strangled.
	She kept talking because she’d never get through it if she stopped. “…I want to remind you that there is still pleasure to be had in this world, and that you are worthy of it. I am not relinquishing my power to you, because I want to do this. What I am doing is showing you the power you already possess. The power to make my knees weak, to make my mouth water, to distract my thoughts.”
	She braced one hand on his thigh and stopped stroking with the other, though she didn’t let go of him. He was hard and hot in her grip, and she made sure she was looking straight into his eyes when she told him, “I want you, Shiro. I want this. Let me help you.”
	He looked down at her and licked his lips. Hesitantly at first, he reached a hand towards her hair. He stopped and switched hands, and she realized he’d been about to use his right. She thought about telling him that it was okay to use whichever hand he wanted, but she was worried that speaking again would break the moment.
	He combed his fingers into her hair and she leaned her head against his palm, closing her eyes briefly to focus on his touch. “Look at me, Allura.” She opened her eyes again and he guided her towards him.
	She gave a less-teasing lick as the tip of his cock came within reach of her tongue and he shuddered again before she slid her mouth onto him. He didn’t push more than that, his eyes falling closed as he groaned quietly. He kept his hand in her hair, but she seemed to have free rein for the moment, so she took advantage of it for some experimentation. She’d never sucked off a human before, let alone Shiro. So far, they weren’t terribly different from Alteans, but she couldn’t allow herself to grow complacent or fall prey to assumptions.
	He must’ve showered before bed because there was still the faint scent of soap. She tugged his pants down more to make sure nothing was going to chafe or rub the wrong way while she was doing this, and she just watched and listened and felt him react.
	She teased the base of his shaft with her fingers while her other hand pushed his shirt up. She’d never seen so much of his skin before now. There were battle scars on his sides and the outside of his thighs. These reminders of what Shiro had been through made her angry at the Galra Empire all over again. Don’t get angry right now. She directed her energy – gods knew she had enough of it at the moment – to trying different combinations of licking, sucking, and touching. 
	She liked hearing it when his breath caught and shuddered, and she hummed thoughtfully at one point, which wrenched a cry of her name from his lips. He looked down at her again, and she tried to take as much of him in as she could. “Holy shit, Allura. And don’t you grin at me like that.”
	Her mouth was too full to grin, but she absolutely believed it showed in her eyes. Denying it would have required her to pull off of him and she didn’t want to do that just yet anyway. She sucked her way back up towards the tip of his cock and his hand tightened in her hair. “That is… SO good,” he confirmed.
	He throbbed in her mouth, and hearing him pant and moan was making her blood race. She licked her way back down, as if her tongue was guiding his cock into her mouth. “Be careful,” he said, “I don’t want you to choke.”
	She arched an eyebrow at him disdainfully. I’m not going to choke. She managed to get more of him in this time before she started her ascent. He was, by this time, slick in her mouth, leaving a slightly salty taste to mingle with the leftover flavor of the warm milk she’d been drinking before she started this.
	She refused to let herself rub between her legs, no matter how badly she wanted to now. I’m going to focus on him. She caressed his skin and began bobbing her mouth – slowly at first – on his shaft. He swore quietly in that way she was beginning to realize meant “I have no other words for how I’m feeling.” Sometimes swearing was bad with him and sometimes it was good. Judging by how his hand fell away from her hair, how his head lolled back against the wall, how he groaned gutturally and struggled to catch his breath, it was very, very good in this case.
	In a way, this was a power fantasy for her, too, to watch the calm, collected Black Paladin lose control because of her. I’m doing this to Shiro, and he loves it. She hadn’t been lying before when she said she wanted to know what he’d taste like, but if he pushed her off and down to the floor, or even stood her up against the wall and took her right now, she wouldn’t complain. She almost ached with need, but she had to see this through. 
	She moved faster, and he managed a breathless series of, “Yes,” occasionally interspersed with her name and whatever pieces of words could struggle past his lips.
	“Allura, I’m…”
	He didn’t need to warn her. She could feel it building in him, hardening him even more. She locked her eyes on his face, sank her mouth all the way down to his base, and let out a long, low, “Mmmmmmmmmm,” of satisfaction. 
	That did it.
	He came in spurts and she had to pull back to keep from choking, but he didn’t seem to mind (or notice). The saltier taste overwhelmed the warm milk she’d had before, and it was a bit much of a single flavor all at once, but it wasn’t, on its own, bad. She decided she didn’t mind swallowing it. 
	She worked on cleaning him up as he tried to breathe again. He groaned out, “Allura, that was so good.”
	“I’m glad you liked it,” she said, giving a last lick before releasing him. She pulled his pants back up as she stood. “I know I did.” She kissed his cheek.
	“Did you?” He sounded a bit surprised.
	“Do you want to ‘double-check’?” she teased. 
	He licked his lips. “What if I say I do?”
	She grinned. “I wouldn’t complain.”
	“What if I want to check with something other than my hands?”
	Her stomach flip-flopped. “I definitely wouldn’t complain.” She felt a hopeful throbbing between her thighs.
	She gasped when he took hold of her waist and picked her up, then grinned when he set her down on the kitchen island counter. “Lay back,” he said.
	“You think you can command me?” she asked imperiously. Her blushing grin was probably ruining the effect.
	“Please lay down, Princess,” he replied, keeping his demanding tone despite his own grin.
	She just laughed and hiked up her robe and nightgown from underneath her. She noticed Shiro going to get the dishtowel “pad” and bringing it over to the floor just in front of the counter. Still, she didn’t do as told.
	He arched an eyebrow at her expectantly and she just mirrored the gesture at him. 
	“I’ll lay back when and if I feel like it,” she informed him.
	He shrugged. “As you wish.” He kneeled, pushing her clothing up more so he could kiss her inner thigh. 
	She smiled and stroked his hair as if she were petting a cat. “I don’t think I’ll last as long as you did,” she warned him.
	“Really?” He nestled his nose against her skin.
	“Mmm. I enjoyed how much you enjoyed being sucked off.”
	The sudden frank language made his kisses stutter for a second, but he just changed legs, kissing one and stroking the other softly – with his right hand, she noticed. “I loved it,” he breathed against her thigh. His tongue lapped after his breath, leaving a warm trail that cooled quickly. He moved inwards. “And I hope you’ll enjoy my eating you out at least half as much as I enjoyed you sucking my cock. Turnabout is fair play, after all.” He paused to tug on her panties; she had to raise her hips for him so he could get them off.
	“I appreciate and encourage your interest in justice.”
	Shiro didn’t respond to that in words. Once he was done sliding her underwear all the way down her legs – a maddeningly slow process in her opinion – he gently parted her folds and teased her with just the tip of his tongue. She gasped and he glanced up at her and then settled in as if he had no intention of ever leaving again. He gave a long, slow, full-tongued lick and she whimpered out an affirmative response.
	“More?”
	“Yes, gods, please.”
	He moved his hands to her ass and pulled her towards his mouth. She wound up with her legs over his shoulders as he started lapping slowly at her clit. She shivered. 
	He would tease her with light licks then use his whole tongue to stroke her. He parted her lips again with his fingers and would pet softly with them while he was using them to keep her open for him. He seemed wholly focused on her, and she remembered how often she’d dreamed of similar scenarios with him. That he would be so overcome with desire for her as to do something like this… 
	“Shiro,” she whimpered again. She did lean back to the counter now, unwilling to use more energy to stay upright.
	In response, he sucked her clit into his mouth. She arched, rocking her hips towards him. His tongue dipped into her once, then again, but mostly he concentrated on the single most pleasurable spot of her entire body and all the things he could do to it with just his mouth. 
	“Oh gods yes Shiro yes yes…” She was babbling, but she couldn’t have stopped if she wanted to. 
	He hummed: a low, rich, velvety sound from the back of his throat that sent little echoes along her nerves. “Ah, GODS Shiro, I’m…” He did it again, and she’d known she was close, but she hadn’t realized exactly how on edge she was until she came in that moment. He didn’t stop until she eased back down, uncurled her toes, and murmured his name in exhausted happiness.
	He kissed his way back up along her thighs and then he was gone. She felt his hands resettling her nightgown, but mostly she was trying to catch her breath. She opened her eyes, and he was carrying her panties and tossing the dishtowels in the laundry. He smiled when he turned back to her. “You okay?”
	She nodded. When she tried to push herself up, he came over to help her sit up. “More than okay. But I don’t think I can walk for a bit.”
	He chuckled and leaned in to nuzzle at her throat. “You don’t have to.” He kissed her skin and straightened up. “But you weren’t kidding about it not taking long.” He offered her discarded underwear to her.
	“I told you: I liked making you happy.” She tucked the panties into a pocket of her robe.
	“You made me a lot more than just ‘happy,’” he pointed out. “I feel like I didn’t give as good as I got.”
	“Maybe another time,” she suggested, stretching languidly.
	“Mm. We’ll start with you next time.”
	“Ooh, I like that i- …” She paused as she came out of her stretch and looked him up and down. “Do you need me to…?”
	He didn’t even glance down at the bulge in his pants. “Nah, I can handle that. It’ll help me go to sleep.”
	“If you’re sure,” she pouted.
	He snorted and retrieved her mug for her. “If you need something to drink, finish this and then go to bed.”
	She huffed at him but accepted the mug. “Worse than Coran,” she insisted.
	He grinned. “Good night, Allura.”
	“Good night, Shiro. Thank you for everything.”
	“Thank you, Princess.” His eyes twinkled when he smiled, and it made her breath catch in her throat. But he walked out of the kitchen, headed towards the paladin sleeping quarters. She sighed and hopped off the counter (only slightly unsteadily), rinsed out her mug, and went back to her room, looking forward to another good night’s sleep and, likely, some very sweet dreams.